100-WORD FICTION
November 17, 2009
by: jovial_cynic
by: jovial_cynic
A recent boingboing article ran the following competition:
The prize is a $700 HP MediaSmart EX495 PC, set up as a Windows home server, with 1.5TB of storage and Mac/Time Machine support. The winner shall be chosen at arbitrary whim. Runners-up get something random from the gadget dungeon.
The theme is "Found in Space." 100 words long. Go!
I enjoy super-short-story challenges, so I entered this 100-word story:
"Amelia, we've found it," said the voice over the com-link.
Amelia pressed her face against the glass, squinting into the darkness with the hopes of seeing it against the background of speckled space. Her tear-swollen eyes could barely focus.
Her father wasn't pleased at having to turn the ship around to find the doll she placed in the system's disposal unit. He wasn't pleased he had to bring his daughter at all. This was no place for children, and this incident would delay the research.
As the robotic arm grasped the doll, an unknown passenger also latched on.
Edit: I was asked in a forum (where I also posted this 100-word fiction) if I could make the piece more self-contained, making it more of a story and less of a story-fragment. This is the revision:
"Amelia, we've found it," said the voice over the com-link.
Amelia pressed her face against the glass, squinting into the darkness with the hopes of seeing it against the background of speckled space. Her tear-swollen eyes could barely focus.
Her father wasn't pleased at having to turn the ship around to find the doll she placed in the system's disposal unit. Again. It was inconvenient, but not intolerable; her father was a patient man, and after his wife's death, he knew how important that doll was to her.
Spotting the doll through the glass, Amelia knew her father loved her.
It is more contained, but I feel like it's not nearly as interesting. Maybe later I'll see if I can tighten up the first version, leaving the suspense in the story somehow.
The prize is a $700 HP MediaSmart EX495 PC, set up as a Windows home server, with 1.5TB of storage and Mac/Time Machine support. The winner shall be chosen at arbitrary whim. Runners-up get something random from the gadget dungeon.
The theme is "Found in Space." 100 words long. Go!
I enjoy super-short-story challenges, so I entered this 100-word story:
"Amelia, we've found it," said the voice over the com-link.
Amelia pressed her face against the glass, squinting into the darkness with the hopes of seeing it against the background of speckled space. Her tear-swollen eyes could barely focus.
Her father wasn't pleased at having to turn the ship around to find the doll she placed in the system's disposal unit. He wasn't pleased he had to bring his daughter at all. This was no place for children, and this incident would delay the research.
As the robotic arm grasped the doll, an unknown passenger also latched on.
Edit: I was asked in a forum (where I also posted this 100-word fiction) if I could make the piece more self-contained, making it more of a story and less of a story-fragment. This is the revision:
"Amelia, we've found it," said the voice over the com-link.
Amelia pressed her face against the glass, squinting into the darkness with the hopes of seeing it against the background of speckled space. Her tear-swollen eyes could barely focus.
Her father wasn't pleased at having to turn the ship around to find the doll she placed in the system's disposal unit. Again. It was inconvenient, but not intolerable; her father was a patient man, and after his wife's death, he knew how important that doll was to her.
Spotting the doll through the glass, Amelia knew her father loved her.
It is more contained, but I feel like it's not nearly as interesting. Maybe later I'll see if I can tighten up the first version, leaving the suspense in the story somehow.