Then to Adam He said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree about which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat from it’;
Cursed is the ground because of you;
With hard labor you shall eat from it
All the days of your life.
Genesis 3:17 (NASB)
Look more closely!
The woman said to the serpent, “From the fruit of the trees of the garden we may eat; but from the fruit of the tree which is in the middle of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat from it or touch it, or you will die.’”
Genesis 3:2-3 (NASB)
Go back to the start of the chapter and look at exactly what Eve said. What are her words? What would have happened if Adam had listened to her and heeded her words?
Can you see it? The problem isn’t that Adam listened to his wife’s voice and obeyed her. The problem is that Adam did NOT heed his wife’s voice.
Look at it more closely: The charge against Adam was not that he obeyed his wife, causing him to eat the fruit. The charge is that he HEARD his wife speak the truth and he STILL ATE THE FRUIT ANYWAY.
He heard her. Her words were true.
The problem is that after hearing God tell him not to eat it, and then hearing his wife say that they were told not to eat it, Adam disobeyed God and ate it anyway.